If you find that your marriage is in a rut, here are five tips to help rejuvenate the relationship and make you feel like you did when you first started dating. The easy-to-do tips should help get your marriage out of a rut and put the spice back in the relationship.
Set Aside Special Time – Most married couples are busy with their hectic schedules that may involve work, children, community activities, or other obligations. In most cases, the spouses are relegated to whatever time that might be left over which is usually not much. Couples should specify a day or period that is devoted just to the two of them to go on a date. If you have small kids, hire a babysitter or take kids to the grandparents, and spend that special time alone. What you do with your time can range from going out to dinner or movies, renting a room at a hotel, taking a leisurely drive to a scenic or romantic place, visit a local attraction, or go for a walk. Do things that you did when you were dating.
Compliment Your Partner Each Day – Everyone likes to be appreciated and an easy way to make your partner feel good is to give them a compliment each day. Married couples should make concerted efforts to find something nice to say about each other. And when you compliment them, give them a hug and a kiss, too. Be sure that you compliments are sincere. If you do this each day, I’m willing to bet that you will start getting compliments in return. This will help you to regain that feeling you had when you were first dating.
Change What You Are Doing – Don’t continue to do the same things and expect a different outcome. If you are in a rut, it’s because you may be doing the same thing over and over again. Change your routine by doing something different from time to time. Do that activity that you know your spouse has wanted to do. If she likes to go out dancing, go ahead and take her dancing. If he likes going to a sporting event, do a little research to learn more about the sport, buy the tickets for him and join him at a game. Revive the variety of things that you did when you were dating and this will help your marriage get out of its rut.
Become More Spontaneous – Sometimes it takes something done at the spur of the moment to get your marriage out of a rut. This is similar to the preceding tip but it works better when you do it without much advance planning. Kidnap your spouse and take them to a fancy hotel (or a seedy motel) for some unbridled passion. Go on a spur of the moment picnic and get what you need at the local bakery or convenience store or fruit stand. Grab your partner as you pass them in the house and give them a passionate kiss or a squeeze to a special body part. This will definitely get their attention and make you feel like you did when you were dating.
Seduce Your Partner – Too often married couples fall into a pattern of behavior where they treat each other like a comfortable pair of old shoes. As mentioned earlier,you’re yourself back in the same mode you were in when you were dating. Seduce your partner by dressing up in your best outfit just to have dinner. Make sure to set the mood for dinner with candles, incense, flowers, or something totally different from the normal dinner setting. Afterwards, romance them on the sofa or on a blanket in front of the fireplace. If you don’t have a fireplace, throw a blanket on the floor and turn on some soothing jazz or favorite music. Or take them into the shower and soap each other down. But whatever you do, pretend that you have just met that person and want to entice them into making love to you, just like you did when you first met. This should help your marriage from getting in a rut and make you feel as if you are dating again.
If you follow these tips, your marriage will thrive from the new emphasis on rejuvenating the relationship. You’ll feel some of the magic return and make you feel like you did when you both first started dating each other.